Wednesday, February 19, 2014

that one time when the tooth fairy got kidnapped by pirates

We've had a rash of missing teeth the past six months or so.  Missing out of mouths, that is- not from underneath the pillow.  Hence the problem.  The girls were losing teeth left and right, but when they'd leave them underneath the pillow?  Nothing!  Zip, zilch, nada.

Understandably, the girls were a little frustrated.  I'm sure they felt like they were getting the short end of the stick.  I mean, they did their job, right?  Growing teeth ain't easy.  And that's not even taking into account the losin' 'em part.

One day I even overheard one of the girls tell one of the younger girls that she was just going to throw her tooth away and not even bother putting it under her pillow.  I was alarmed (on my children's behalf).  What is the world coming too when you can't even count on the Tooth Fairy?

Luckily, we soon found out what this whole absentee business has been about.  A few weeks ago, Claire happened to lose yet another tooth.  Apparently she was still holding out a little faith in the Tooth Fairy.  That next morning, the several of the girls woke shimmering with fairy glitter and a fistful of gold dollars underneath their pillow.  Along with the loot, they found this note:

Dear Girls,   
I offer you my sincere apologies for the neglect of my Tooth Fairy duties the past while.  It was not without good reason, however I am ashamed nonetheless.  You see, I was detained in North Africa by a sizable number of pirates.  Pirates!  Yes, it was quite the adventure.  They were, at first, very fierce and frightening, but in due course became much more friendly toward me.  It seems even pirates need the Tooth Fairy!  Once I explained that I would be happy to render my services freely, (kidnapping me was not necessary!), we were able to come to friendlier terms and arrange for my release.  Don't worry, I was not harmed during my adventure- but let me assure you, it was an adventure in the greatest sense of the word!  Thank you for your exceeding patience during my absence.  I do hope you are well and assure you I have been most anxious to attend to your teeth.   
Best Wishes, The Tooth Fairy  
 PS.  Thank you for taking such good care of your teeth.  After dealing with pirate teeth, I have become most grateful for those of you who know what a tooth brush is and take care to use it!  I have come to the conclusion that there is nothing more ghastly than the tooth of a pirate! 

I guess we'll forgive her after all.


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