Monday, October 25, 2010

help, anyone?

Last weekend was one of those that made me think we have no business ever thinking we should have another child.
Not that we are, ahem, thinking of another child.  But if we were, we'd have no business doing it.

No business at all.

Which gets me to thinking, what in the heck do you do when you have a child who argues?  Who argues, and argues, and argues?  Or kids who make you feel like you are a mute?  You know, when you can feel your lips moving, but wonder if anything is actually coming out? Cuz no one seems to even register that I'm talking!  Some days, I tell you. . .

I try to be patient, I try not being patient.  And NOTHING. IS. WORKING!!!!

Not that you ever have any conflict in your pretty little homes. 

But if you do?  I need some help.


Darcie said...

Oh dear, I keep hoping it will get easier as they get older, but everyone seems to agree it just gets trickier. Good luck up there. I'm sure you're underestimating yourself. (and I personally can't wait for Wood Baby #5... boy this time, okay?).

Melissa Summers said...

ok here is my advice because I am such an expert. (ha ha). I heard this great idea about a bench that you put the 2 people arguing on and they have to work it out and apoligize and say they love each other before they can get up. I have also learned that yelling doesn't work. I get on my kids level right in their face and tell them what it is that I want them to do. Eye contact I think is the key. I think the TV is the biggest distraction in our house. When no one in listening I turn it off and then I tell them exactly what they are suppose to be doing. Hope that helps.

dippyrooroo said...

Do you mean she argues with you? Or argues with her sisters? A child that argues with me, I very calmly make sure they know that I can make their whole life come to a screeching halt if they decide not to treat me with respect. No friends, no technology, no special classes, and we go back to the basics of apropriate behavior till their attitude improves and they apologise and treat me with more respect. I don't think we've ever had to do that for more than a few days before things turned around. Because they understand that they've been wrong, and they truely feel bad about their outbursts.
Arguing with eachother is sometimes harder for me. Often I think that when they have too little to do they start filling their time with fighting, so I start assigning more jobs. And letting them know why I'm doing it helps them to shape up too. And I'm so mean that if I give them plenty of time to finish a task, I let them know if it's not done by mealtime, they won't eat till it's done. And of course, when they are behaving, I make sure to take the time to really enjoy them, and be extra sweet and loving. So they know I'm not being mean, I'm taking steps to correct their bad behavior. At least that's how I try to do it. I agree with your friend Melissa about how being an expert at parenting is a joke! Thank goodness for prayer! It's wonderful that Heavenly Father knows so much better than we do!