somedays i amaze myself

So.  A few weeks ago, I one-upped my most embarrassing moment ever.

A few days after the girls went back to school, Claire and I took Mr. Sam to his one year well check.  I was, as usual, unprepared and hadn't brought along any snacks or lunch for the kids to eat.  As we waited to see our favorite Dr. Brown, Claire decided that she would like a cheese quesadilla for lunch.  Perfect, I thought!  Cafe Rio!

Well, as soon as Dr. Brown decided that Samuel was perfect (we already knew that, of course), we headed for lunch.  I already knew what to order for the kids- two kids quesadillas, please.  As I looked over the menu for myself, I decided that in fact, I wasn't all that hungry and I would actually like a kids quesadilla too, thank you very much.



Here's where it got a little dicey.  I'll preface this whole saga by stating that in the past, whenever we have ordered kids quesadillas we have also ordered adult entrees also.  So, it makes sense that I hadn't paid much attention to the total amount and had assumed that the price for the kids item was a dollar and some change.  Well. . .we've all heard what happens to a person when they "assume", eh?  They make an ____ out of you and me.

Yip.  I pretty much made one of those out of myself.


This is how it went down.  I marched myself and Claire and Mr. Sam up to the counter and said, "I'd like three kids quesadillas, please."  At which point the little 'ol lady making tortillas counted my kiddos, looked at me with a somewhat disgusted look, and said, "And what can I get for you?" 

"That's it!  Just three kids quesadillas."  I answered cheerfully.  Another disgusted look. 

Hmmmm, maybe she's having a bad day, I think to myself and move on down the line.  At which point the next guy asks, "What did you have?" 

"Three kids quesadillas."  Once again, he counts the kids and shoots me another disgusted look.  "That's it?". . .to which I answer with a smile, "Yip!"

I move on down the line.  Same questions, same checking out my kids, same looks.  And the whole time I'm thinking to myself, "Geez.  What's the big deal if I'm a light eater today?"

Toward the end of the line, we repeat the process.  This time as I repeat my order, he tells me, "I've only got two here."  I'm thinking, what-in-the-heck-is their-problem-today and allow myself to get the tiniest bit sassy.  "Noooo.  I ordered three." I correct him.  This time, he shoots the guy next to him 'the look' and yells down the line for one more kids quesadilla.


Finally, we get to the cash register, where the girl asks you-know-what and I repeat my order.  She looks the whole lot of us over and says, "And what did you order?" 

I feel like yelling, "NOTHING!  JUST THREE FREAKING KIDS QUESADILLAS!"  But I don't.  I was polite.  When she asked me what we would like to drink?  "Water, please." 

At this she rolls her eyes (really, she did) and leans over to the girl at the cash register.  "Just charge her a dollar since she didn't order anything else."

At which point she rings up the register and announces, "A dollar and six cents, please."

And me, being the brainiac that I am, says innocently, "That's all?  I had three of them!"


Another disgusted look.  Another pair of rolling eyes.   "They're FREE."







The worst part?  I was so stunned that I didn't really think through what I had done until the ride home.  After I had sat in there for who-knows-how-long with my two kids and gobbled down our three kids quesadillas.  I mean, I could have explained myself and offered a few more dollars.  If I had any self respect at all, I would have at least hustled out to the car so we could eat in our own private humiliation.  I am sure every worker watched me and rolled their eyes a million times about "that lady".

At least our family has gotten a good laugh.  When I told Courtney and Nate, I couldn't help but mention what a great deal I'd gotten, at least.  I mean, who can beat lunch for three people for a mere $1.06.  To which they laughed like crazy and replied that no, I'd gotten "hosed".  After all, they were supposed to be free and I paid a dollar-oh-six!



(Just so you know, we went to Courtney's sister's house last Saturday evening.  When we told her we were coming, she texted Courtney this message: "Can you ask Kelly to run by Cafe Rio and pick us up twenty-three kids quesadillas?"  Pretty sure I'll never live this one down.)